And for other Sistas, those who are coming out of failed marriages, often with kids (and a goodly bit of weight) in tow, we’re the guys “they should have met” lo those many years ago.Again, please don’t get me wrong here – many people find each other and indeed, love, after a bad marriage ends.
Just as many do so, with children involved from previous unions.And I would never presume to tell another man what he should or should not do in such circumstances; it has long my my stance that it is for every man to decide for himself what his life will be, romantic or otherwise.Two, not all Sistas feel that they are slumming it or dating/mating/marrying down when paired off with a Blue Collar Brotha.And three, as many Sistas rightly assert, not all Blue Collar Brothas are the salt of the proverbial earth – many do indeed have problems, ranging from Baby Mama Drama, to drug, alcohol, mental and emotional problems, to anger management issues, poor money managing skills, you name it.This kind of narrative – which does indeed have its basis in fact, I am fully aware and freely admit – has been extant for most of my post-highschool life.
Now, to be sure, and to be fair, we have to enter a few things into the official record: one, as noted above, yes, there are more college-educated, professional and higher earning Sistas, than there are Brothas, in absolute numbers.
By all accounts, Brothas, Blue Collar and otherwise, have left the building a long time ago.
I’ve written about how so many Brothas, Blue Collar and otherwise, have been quietly voting with their feet for quite some time now; Sistas of a Certain Cohort have made it all too-clear as to which Brothas are to step up front, and which who needn’t apply – and the Brothas have listened to you.
But, the problem that I have with these kinds of “the sky is falling” discussions, such as the recent one in the Atlantic and that which occurs all the time in Black America, is the glaring assumptions that are made about Blue Collar Guys in such a broadstroke manner, and the fact that for all the handwringing and alarmist chatter, no one has actually deigned to talk to Blue Collar Guys themselves, and to hear, in their own voices, what, if anything, they have to say about the matter.
Please, don’t take my word for it – do up a Google search or two yourself.
It’s just the way that this whole “Brave New World” type of discussion is conducted, not just in both the White and Black media but as well in real life conversations and the like, well, it just rubs me the wrong way.