This joke is twofold: carbon dating can mean “two carbons on a date” or “using the decay of carbon to determine the date of organic materials.” The other line, “where half you been all my life?
” sounds like a romantic line, “where have you been all my life?
” but also refers to the half life of these carbon-14.
I mean, it's not like it's actually alive, it's just a nondescript blob of rock!
It's not like it..know...cares if you talk to it for a few weeks!
Once a piece of carbon is found, the dater usually talks to it for several weeks, starting with only saying one sentence or two, then backing off so as not to seem intimidating.
Some critics have asked, "Why not just pick up the carbon and rape it?
Then I noticed how it had a wide arrange of allotropes, and that did it; I squirted in my pants." Indeed, carbon daters find all the chemical properties of carbon inherently arousing, though the specifics often differ; many prefer it in its diamond form, while others prefer the radioactive isotope of carbon-14, actually finding it sexually arousing to get radiation sickness and die.
Of the world's fetishes, carbon dating is one of the most difficult to have, because sexual satisfaction is very hard to come by.Unlike Coprophiliacs, Pedophiles, and animal-lovers, who can ease their horniness by simply grabbing a piece of poop, a rabbit, or traveling to a local preschool for an hour or two, carbon daters often have more difficulty finding ways to sexually satisfy themselves.Indeed, it was ranked the number two most frustrating sexual fetish of all time (losing only to the number one most frustrating fetish, mooning, in which the sufferer wants to have sex with the moon) in an as-of-yet unreleased issue of Time Magazine.In the periodical table of elements, Sodium is represented by the symbol Na which looks like the word “Nah,” meaning “No.” Another t-shirt, another play on words.The humerus is the long bone in your upper arm, but the word sounds like “humorous,” as in “funny.” So the joke sounds like it says both “I found this humerous (funny),” and “I found this bone.” If an electron has more positrons than electrons, it has a positive charge.Very few people are born as carbon-lovers; they often start out life being sexually attracted to much more socially acceptable elements, such as magnesium.