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I, and I think I can safely say this for every trans* person, would like to, for once be seen and respected as the identified gender without being treated like an alien or a science experiment.So going back to your original point, Mer, I wouldn't say it's always a terrible thing.

Do you think a lesbian can date an FTM or transman (as some would prefer) and still identify as lesbian while respecting the persons gender?

A lot get really pissed off about this for some reason.

I think if whoever I'm dating was able to respect my gender identity and we ended up clicking, I could look past their sexuality. Several of the people I've come out to have asked me all kinds of weird questions. Now, if I were to ever date a lesbian, I don't think it would bother me as long as she didn't treat my gender like it's a big deal and didn't call me her girlfriend or refer to me using female pronouns. And sometimes people fall for people they aren't sexually attracted to, asexuals are proof of that.

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it's like, if you fall for someone, you fall for someone (FTM or not) and it's something you can't help...what if that person truly loved you and you had feelings for them back, ....would you really not date them because how they identified? I've encountered a number of trans* chasers through my time online.

Believe me, not only is the experience unsavory and creepy but overall, dehumanizing.

I don't it's being disrespectful in my opinion, some Women can be disrespectful but were talking about as a whole here......i mean.

Just because i'm lesbian, doesn't mean ...i'm going to avoid FTMs or men in general.

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I should be working on my Ph D related stuff but instead I am procrastinating, and longing for new friends all of a sudden.

Everything's pretty confusing when it comes to relationships.would also how they appear be an issue? because not every lesbian is the samewell yeah, but I mean..does depend on the person and a fetish is insulting to me as well but if someone truly loved someone who was FTM.....i mean, why should how the girl identifies matter?